Joan Poh (Rowing)
Joan is the girl that wanted to go beyond societal norms and to break free from the limitations that boxed her within. Joan always had an interest in sports but growing up in Singapore, the financial burden stopped her from pursuing it passionately. It was only after she started her nursing career that she had the financial stability to go after her sporting ambitions.
Most athletes train their whole lives to even be good enough to compete internationally. They follow a strict regime and best practices taught by governing bodies and institutions. However, Joan was the exception to the rule. Joan is the only person to represent Singapore in the SEA games, Asian Games and World Championships in Rowing without the same level of support.
Joan is the girl that wanted to go beyond societal norms and to break free from the limitations that boxed her within. Joan always had an interest in sports but growing up in Singapore, the financial burden stopped her from pursuing it passionately. It was only after she started her nursing career that she had the financial stability to go after her sporting ambitions.
Most athletes train their whole lives to even be good enough to compete internationally. They follow a strict regime and best practices taught by governing bodies and institutions. However, Joan was the exception to the rule. Joan is the only person to represent Singapore in the SEA games, Asian Games and World Championships in Rowing without the same level of support.
Joan is the girl that wanted to go beyond societal norms and to break free from the limitations that boxed her within. Joan always had an interest in sports but growing up in Singapore, the financial burden stopped her from pursuing it passionately. It was only after she started her nursing career that she had the financial stability to go after her sporting ambitions.
Most athletes train their whole lives to even be good enough to compete internationally. They follow a strict regime and best practices taught by governing bodies and institutions. However, Joan was the exception to the rule. Joan is the only person to represent Singapore in the SEA games, Asian Games and World Championships in Rowing without the same level of support.
A little bit about Joan…
What is a day in your life like?
Joan: I decided to juggle both rowing and nursing because I had a clear vision of what I wanted to achieve, and I understood that it will not come easy. I knew it would require managing my expectations: to plan my schedules around shifts and training, to cut down on social commitments, to rush between the two and deliberately plan sufficient rest and recovery periods.
After my morning nursing shifts, I would go for a 2-3-hour land training and turn in early. When I have afternoon nursing shifts, I would wake up for water training from 6-8 am then rest at the rowing venue before finishing it with another session and then head to work. On my rare off days, I would train 2-3 times a day then schedule in some catch-up time with friends and family. This unusual routine has required a lot of understanding and support from the people around me, my colleagues and also the hospital.
What are some challenges you have faced in your career as an athlete and what did you do to overcome them?
Joan: During my training stint in Greece, I vividly recall crying my eyes out in between training and after training in the shower. I remember seeing a plane fly past in the sky and I wondered why I was there. I developed vices to cope with my emotions and sought comfort in emotional eating.
I must continue to do the next right thing to get even just an inch closer, slowly but surely. I will continue to take heart and be ready for when the next opportunity presents itself. I am not afraid of a lack of opportunity. I am afraid that when an opportunity comes knocking, I am not ready to take flight.
What did you do to overcome your experience in Greece? Could you elaborate a little?
Joan: Training then was tough, so tough that had if I picked up the training program from the ground walking on the streets, I would scoff and deem it to be impossible to manage and bin it. What made it harder at that time was how I found myself feeling the most alone.
I was learning, I was getting better, I was convinced that was where I had to be and those were absolutely the things I needed to do to give myself the best chance at the Olympic qualification. It was an experience for me, a lesson for me that I will never forget – because it is in times of difficulty and challenges that you have to dig deeper – I had to see the cause, I had to be surer why I was doing the things I was.
I flew there on a one-way ticket, not being sure of what is to come and when I should return because at that time Singapore had no other carded rowers training, no Rowing coach and no competition around; everything was happening in Europe. The Coaching Director of FISA (from the French, Fédération Internationale des Sociétés d'Aviron), Giovani Postiglione, who was coaching Greece agreed to take me in at little cost. So there I was alone but with a coaching team and a group of young but very well-trained rowers to work with… There was even regular competition. There I met rowers from many other countries such as Lithuania, Serbia, Kazakhstan and Turkey etc.
The loneliness I felt drove me into a dark and even lonelier place. And I allowed it to convince me that my self-worth and value rested on my weight and my achievements… That even when my spirit was broken, resting was not an option. I saw self-compassion and self-care as slowing down my progress. Because it was so hard, I had to prove and achieve something – nothing must get in my way.
But in the darkest of times, along came a small handful of people, who reminded me that they loved me before any of my achievements. They loved me fiercely when I was training, and even fiercer when I was broken. They reminded me that they love me for how I stay true to myself and my pursuits against the odds, they reminded me that they take deep pride and celebrate my courage in plucking myself from a stable income, adhering to any training requirements even when uncertain and fearful. They remind me that they are immensely proud of me when I wake up for training despite the loneliness. They taught me that win or lose, fast or slow, lean or not, athlete or not, I was already enough. They and their lessons have given me the reasons to fight this right. I must preserve my health, and not pursue this dream at the expense of my body and mental health.
